This is the time of year when many people make New Year’s resolutions. I don’t do that anymore. Instead, I try to think more strategically about what changes I want to make and what I want to add to my life, not what I want to stop doing. After reading some great books, I have come up with a system that works for me when it comes to setting goals. NOTE: this system works can be used at any time of year, not just in January. Setting goals can be done whenever it works best for you!
Grab some paper, a favorite pen and some coffee or tea. Here are some suggestions for thinking about how you can make this a great year for you!
Caution: this post might look like it will take you a full day to do all this thinking and planning, but it won’t. Just do what you can, in small amounts if necessary, until you finish the process. By the time you are done, you will be on the path to making your life even better in the next year!
Step 1 – Reflection
First, think about what went well during the past year. Instead of feeling down about all the goals you didn’t meet, all the bad habits you continued doing, think about what you did do well. This will help you get started on a positive note and will help show you what you might want to do more of during the next year.
Here are some questions to get you started. You don’t need to answer all of these. This is just to help get you thinking.
*what will you remember about this past year?
*who are some people you met or re-connected with that added value to your life?
*what were your three favorite moments from the past year?
*what is something that you are proud of from the past year?
*if you experienced a big challenge or experienced a great loss, what good things came from that experience?
*what were some “aha” moments, where you realized something about yourself and your life?
*were there any goals that you did achieve last year?
*what worked to help you achieve those goals?
*were there any goals that you did not achieve last year?
*what got in your way and prevented you from achieving those goals?
Step 2 – Visualize
In addition to the questions above, start thinking about how you want your life to look in five or ten years. (Some people suggest thinking about three years from now. It doesn’t matter. Just choose some amount of time and start dreaming!)
Here are some questions to get you started:
*what will you do in your work?
*where will you live?
*what relationships are important to you?
*what will you do for fun or recreations?
*how will you look and feel?
*what will your financial life be like?
*where will you travel or vacation?
*how do you want your life to look in the next five years?
*what is the ONE change that would improve your life the most next year?
*what is the ONE thing you need more of in your life?
*what is your biggest challenge?
*what is your greatest need?
Get very specific in your imagination about how you will look, feel, live, what you will be doing and who you will be doing life with.
As you are thinking about these questions and doing this visualizing, just write whatever comes to mind. As I write, tasks I need to complete often come to mind (return sweater to Nordstrom, clean out hall closet, write letter to a friend, etc.). Even though those might not be “goals”, I write them down anyway. That way, my mind doesn’t fixate on trying to remember those tasks and it can be freed up to think of the bigger things. Sometimes, those tasks give me clues as to other things I want to do. For instance, if I keep thinking of people I need to write or people I need to call, maybe a goal of mine should be something like keeping in touch with friends or contacting people who need encouragement.
Once you have this brainstormed list, put stars beside the things that you believe would make the biggest difference in your life.
Step 3 – Identify 10 dreams
In a podcast episode, Rachel Hollis talks about how to do this visualizing process. Rachel calls it her 10-10-1 system. First she recommends envisioning your life ten years from now. What do you want to be, do and have in your life?
Once you have done some visualization, here are Rachel’s suggestions for what do next:
First, take all those dreams you just envisioned for yourself and narrow them down to ten. (You can combine them however you want if narrowing down to ten is difficult.)
Now write each of these dreams as if they have already happened. So you will write them in the present tense. For example: I am an exceptional wife. I earn a six figure salary.
Step 4 – Identify 1-3 goals to help you achieve your dreams
Here are Rachel’s tips for what to do next:
Now that you’ve envisioned your life ten years from now and you’ve identified ten dreams, it’s time for the “one”: write one goal that will help move you toward those ten dreams.
Rachel recommends going “all in” on that one goal, instead of setting a bunch of smaller goals.
And speaking of that one goal — make it a stretch goal. If it doesn’t “scare” you a little bit, it’s not big enough! Make it something that you are almost not sure you can achieve, something that makes you nervous. I promise that you will work harder than you have ever worked on a goal before because it will push you out of your comfort zone. Think of how exciting it will be when you do finally achieve the goal!
I have read lots of other things that recommend up to three big goals instead of one. Do what works for you. I tend to set two goals — one that is more work-related and one that is more health-related.
Keep in mind that there is a difference between a goal and a project or task. My goal might be to have a decluttered/organized home. A project might be to clean out closets and donate/sell or re-organize the contents. I define projects as the tasks I need to do to bring me closer to the goal. More about that in the next section.
Step 5 – Break big yearly goals down into 12-week goals along with projects/tasks to help you achieve the goal
A famous quote from Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, is a quote you may have heard before:
~Napoleon Hill
“A goal is a dream with a deadline.”
I agree with that, somewhat. As Rachel Hollis says in the Start Today journal:
“A lot of people also say that a goal has to have a time limit, but I don’t like that for goals because I feel like it sets you up for failure . . . The intention here is that working on your ideal self is a lifelong process to become who you were meant to be. Lifelong processes don’t have a time limit. All that matters is that you have consistency. We’re not looking for perfection; we’re looking for habit and that’s why this journal is a practice for every day.”~Rachel Hollis
That is very true for many goals, such as getting better at something (like tennis or teaching) or working on something that is relationship related. However, some goals are ones that can be achieved within a time frame. Maintaining that achievement might be a lifelong process, but getting there might benefit from a deadline. To help set those deadlines, consider breaking your goal down into
Here is how I use it: instead of making these goals/projects something that I will complete by the end of the year (which seems a long way off when it’s only January), I identify two goals that I want to achieve in the next 12 weeks. Then I list the daily and weekly tasks I will need to do to reach that goal. For example, if my goal is to lose ten pounds during the next 12 weeks, my daily/weekly tasks might look like this:
*follow Faster Way to Fat Loss beginner workout plans five days a week
*intermittent fasting for 16 hours each day
*follow carb cycling eating plans each day
*drink at least 64 oz. of water each day.
To make sure I am on track to meet my goal, I could weigh myself each week (what the authors call a “lag indicator”). But I also score my completion of each task by checking off each task I completed as a percentage of the number possible (a “lead indicator”). For the task of following the Faster Way to Fat Loss beginner workouts five days a week, the possible number is five. If I only complete four workouts, my lead indicator for this task is 80%. If your lead indicator scores are 85% or higher, you are on track to achieve your 12 week goal. So in this case, I might look at what prevented me from completing that fifth workout and change whatever I might need to change in order to get that workout in next week. Get the idea?
At the end of 12 weeks, sit down and evaluate your progress toward your goals. What is working well? What do you need to change in order to make progress toward that big year-end goal? Set some new 12-week goals and what you will do to meet the goals and begin again! Reflection and self-assessment are critically important tasks for teachers to do in their work, and I’ve found that they work well for personal goals as well.
Step 6 – Start with a penny a day
The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson is a book that was recommended to me by Jennifer Hogan (the Compelled Educator blog). Jeff uses one of my favorite quotes to make his point in this book:
“. . . do the thing, and you shall have the power . . .”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Here’s some wisdom from Jeff:
“To accomplish anything worth accomplishing, to create success, to achieve your dreams, you don’t have to do impossible, extraordinary, superhuman things. But you have to do something. You have to start with a penny.”
~Jeff Olson
Throughout the book, Jeff talks about the importance of small, simple, daily actions that help you complete a larger goal. Here is an example:
~Jeff Olson
“If I told you that reading Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich would change your life, would you sitown and read it, cover to cover, today? Mind you, that’s a 256-page book, and those aren’t lightweight pages . . . But could you read a penny’s worth — say, ten pages? . . . I don’t know how much you would get out of ten pages; maybe a lot, maybe nothing. Let’s say you get nothing. But if you could read ten pages today, could you read ten more tomorrow? Ofcourse you could — anyone who can read could do that.
“And if you do that, and you keep it up for every day for a year, you will have read about a dozen brilliant, life-transforming classics. Your mind will be filled with the strategies and know-how to create a startling new level of success. You will have thoughts of millionaires — all from a penny.
“But you need to start with the penny.”
As you think of tasks to move you toward achieving your goals, what are some small, simple, daily disciplines you could do? Start with a penny. Know that every little step you take is adding up. This is similar to Rachel Hollis’s words about lifelong processes.
Jeff’s advice reminds me of another great book — Getting Back to Happy by Marc & Angel Chernoff. In the introduction to their chapter “Rituals: Practice Daily What You Want to Manifest Regularly”, they say:
“Carve out a little time every day to focus on the things that matter most, and the benefits will return to you exponentially.”
~Marc & Angel Chernoff
In this chapter, they discuss setting goals and why that process often does not work. “Here’s the truth: goals don’t make positive changes happen, daily rituals do.” Marc and Angel go on to say that it’s possible to focus on our goals too much!
“Too often we obsess over a big goal, something we desperately want in our life,but are completely unfocused when it comes to the ritual — the recurring steps — that ultimately makes the goal attainable.”
~Marc & Angel Chernoff
Getting back to the weight loss example: Marc and Angel explain that if you stop thinking about your goal to lose ten pounds, and focus instead on eating healthy (with specific “rituals” that you will follow) and exercising every day (again, with some specific “rituals”), you would still lose weight and get closer to your goal. This, too, might not fit perfectly into a deadline category, but at the end of 12
Losing weight is one example of an outcome goal over which you may not have complete control. Other factors might interfere with your losing weight at the rate you might like to lose it. However, what you can control are the processes, or the “rituals”, that will lead you to the goal.
“What we’ve learned . . . is this: nothing will change unless you make a daily ritual that reinforces your goal.”
~Marc & Angel Chernoff
Building on Rachel’s advice about lifelong processes and Jeff’s advice about starting with a penny, Marc and Angel also recommend thinking of rituals as lifestyle changes that you’ll be doing for the long term. Instead of planning to work out every day for two hours (when you have not been working out at all), plan to work out for just 15 minutes. You can do anything for 15 minutes. But if that is too hard for some reason, drop it down to ten minutes and work up from there. As Jeff says, you have to start with a penny.
Other helpful tips:
*Start and end your day with gratitude. Think about or write down five things for which you are grateful. Being grateful will change your life for the better.
*Read your goals every single day. Bonus points for writing them down every day and saying them out loud.
*Daydream and visualize yourself having achieved your goal, or being in the lifelong process of achieving it.
*Keep a journal. Track your progress, set smaller goals, reflect on mistakes or reflect on growth. You could also use your journal for the gratitude practice and for writing your goals down every day.
*Consider sharing your goals with others. Use social media. Tell your spouse or other family members. You also might consider forming a group of friends (sometimes called a “mastermind”) where you meet to share your goals and encourage each other. This builds accountability to others, which is a huge motivator. Getting a coach is another great way to get support, encouragement and accountability.
*One caution about sharing your goals. Make sure you are sharing them with people who will support and encourage you, not laugh or tell you that your goal is impossible.
*Keep your rituals small to start, but do them daily. Another piece of wisdom from Marc & Angel:
“You can’t lift a thousand pounds all at once, yet you can easily lift one pound a thousand times. Small, repeated, incremental efforts will get you to your goal. It doesn’t happen in an instant, but it does happen a lot faster than not getting there at all.”
~Marc & Angel Chernoff
*Log your progress by putting a star or some other symbol on your planner for every day that you complete your ritual that leads to a goal. Then — don’t break the pattern! Momentum is everything.
*Create visual reminders of your rituals or set reminders on your phone.
I hope that these tips will help you to identify your big goals for the next year! I would love to hear about how you’re using these tips.